BEING LOVED

she's someone in your life she's someone you love <3 she'll go nasty if you make her cry. librababy easily contented very indecisive green & red
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LOVES

<3 I LOVE YOU :D
<3 hockey
<3 chocolates and snacks
<3 shopping and fashion
<3 music and dance

PLAYLIST

SAMANTHA JADE - BOYFRIEND

You're Oppressing Me
Fall Back I Need Some Room
You Want This Thing To Work
I Need You To Do All The Necessary Things To Keep Me
But You Just Keep On Pushing Me
You're About To Barely Be My Boyfriend

SPREAD THE LOVE

THE LOVED ONES

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Memoirs

June 2005
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THANKS!

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designer: sweet_surrender
others: blogger blogskins

9:07 PM;

lately, my brain cells have been killed by the never ending projects and assignments. i think i can go crazy. i don't like my hectic life. which is also same time as the IVP. i hope i'm managing my time well.

tomorrow's game will be tough as we'll be facing the strongest team. one momenr i'm nervous. and yet another, i felt relax. i mean, no matter what, i've to put in my best, regardless of my opponent's strength!

oh well, week is pack. yesterday i had a game. today relax. tomorrow game again. thurs till sat family chalet. and sunday, probably girls outing again. so, today was the only day i could spend with him. but i'm happy. so it'll pull me through without meeting for the whole week.

satisfied and happy, i went home. just thinking about tomorrow's game. let's play well. (:

GOOD LUCK GIRLS!

no one.

1:04 AM;

i can't imagine myself waking up in the morning



without seeing my mum in the kitchen, cooking my breakfast, my dad hurrying of to work and my sis trying to get herself out of bed, just like me.



without hearing anything from my 3 best girlfriends.


without getting any messages from him.


without seeing the two crazy (abnormal) girls in class everyday.

without holding the hockey stick in my hand, looking forward to every training i have.

i just wonder, what's life without all these. will i still be me?

oh well, just a random feeling
i'm not okay ): i'm fine (:




and i'm still praying hard that i won't screw up today.

no one.

2:51 PM;

i think, i'm going to breakdown soon. i really can't adapt. i really can't fit in. can everyone stop asking me. i really don't know.


i really




don't know.

no one.

8:46 PM;

this will hit the 300th posts (:wow! 300! HAA HAA!

oh well, so many changes in a blink of an eye. so many things. there's so many changes and sometimes i feel as if i can't fit and adapt to these changes. felt like giving up. felt like running away. felt like disappearing away from this world.

sometimes, i want to talk to someone. but who can i really turn to? i don't know. felt like a burden to the world. ):

never like such feelings. oh please chase away these feelings. i'm afraid for the future. i really am.

and i'm nervous for friday. can i make it? or am i going to screw the game? i don't know. i'm just nervous. pull me through these 3 weeks! and he told me, if i'm afraid and scared, i've lost it all.

assignments and projects are definitely something that i can't escape in this learning world. and i'm tired of it. look at it! there's really so much things to do in such a little time.

all i know, i'm going crazy. i think i really am.

no one.

3:13 PM;

spent half of my day with mr.sweet (:

woke up early just to watch him play basketball. we went lot one to have our lunch and walked around a while. and like always being nice and sweet (although we did not eat LONG JOHN SILVER!).

love spending my time with him <3


I WANT TO SHOP!!

no one.

5:17 PM;

Nobody knows

Nobody knows but me

That I sometimes cry

If I could pretend that I'm asleep

When my tears start to fall

I peek out from behind these walls

I think nobody knows

Nobody knows no

Nobody likes

Nobody likes to lose their inner voice

The one I used to hear before my life

Made a choice

But I think nobody knows

No no

Nobody knows

No

Baby

Oh the secret's safe with me

There's nowhere else in the world that I could ever be

And baby don't it feel like I'm all alone

Who's gonna be there after the last angel has flown

And I've lost my way back home

I think nobody knows no

I said nobody knows

Nobody cares

It's win or lose not how you play the game

And the road to darkness has a way

Of always knowing my name

But I think nobody knows

No no

Nobody knows no no no no

Baby

Oh the secret's safe with me

There's nowhere else in the world that I could ever be

And baby don't it feel like I'm all alone

Who's gonna be there after the last angel has flown

And I've lost my way back home

And oh no no no no

Nobody knows

No no no no no no

Tomorrow I'll be there my friend

I'll wake up and start all over again

When everybody else is gone

No no no

Nobody knows

Nobody knows the rhythm of my heart

The way I do when I'm lying in the dark

And the world is asleep

I think nobody knows

Nobody knows

Nobody knows but me

me

pink - nobody knows

where are you? ):

no one.

9:39 PM;

i hate tomorrow
and tomorrow tomorrow
and tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow

cause, he'll be away ))):



i'm missing him already<3

no one.

10:35 PM;

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DARLING TESSA (:

7-11. a day tessa turn a year older. hees. and we met her today at her house just to spend some time together on her birthday. oh man, i'm missing her already. I LOVE HER <3



and i'm so not looking forward to tomorrow onwards ):

no one.

7:28 PM;

i'm dead tired! sooooo tired!

had src 4-aside at padang today. woke up super early. and i'm just home. really dead. i'm so tired and DARK! haa! but i had fun. and well done to np guys team! you did well. girls team did well too. so well done everyone (:



only i was the disappointment

no one.

4:37 AM;

4th of November

oh great. today is the day. i'm so not looking forward especially when i'm sick. but still, i've to be there. i'm nervous. i'm not sure if i can make it. i hope i can. wish me luck today.

yesterday, i went out with him. (:
had pizza! yay! we ended eating pizza. and the funny thing is that we sat at the same table and the same waitress took our orders. oops. i think she remembered us :x HAA HAA!

this will pull me through today!

no one.

11:00 PM;

i can't dribble.
i can't pass.
i can't defend.
i can't forward.

and i can't find a perfect reason why i'm still here.

why? anyone know why?

the harder i try, the more i fall. i keep looking forward to every training held. i get excited for each training as i can play hockey. but the thought of the way i play, makes me want to run away.

and it's really bringing my mood down. i suck!





smile zie smile
you're doing fine in hockey.




ok. stop self-consoling. it's not changing things.

no one.