Tuesday, October 30, 2007
6:56 AM;
"zie, mark your man close. stay close. come forward and tackle."
those were the words i keep hearing on the pitch last thursday.
those voices, those images haunt me till now.
i don't know why, but i just can't forget.
it shouldn't be a goal still.
if only i could have perform better...
no one.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
11:24 PM;
today was the very first game for pol-ite. and i am very disappointed with myself. i don't know what hit me, but i was just not playing my best. in fact, this was the worse i've played. everyone came up to me and told me i could play so much better than this. so much more. i just can't stop feeling disappointed. i know i'm so much better than this.
i'm just so disappointed.
no one.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
11:19 PM;
today was the finals for Singapore International Hockey Challenge. as soon as i reached there, i saw the Australia women's team walking out, with gold medals. enough said.
and on the pitch, the Singapore and Pakistan's men team were preparing themselves. A few shots, drills, and they were set for the game. the game started off quite well. and with the 3 goals scored in the first half by Pakistan, tension filled the stadium. i was there, hoping Singapore would at least score a goal. 3-1 doesn't sound that bad at least. and Singapore team did, with a short corner. however, Pakistan scored again, and ended the game with 4-1. although they lost, i was so proud of our Singapore team that they managed to get into the semi-finals.
the next game was something i've been looking forward for. India vs Australia. must be exciting seeing two strong team aiming for the first place. the game started, as soon, it got a little boring, cause none of the team is scoring, neither did they get any short corners. it was just mere passing and attempt to score.
i was hoping at least one of the team could score, to create tension. the India team did during the second half. and the Australia team was back for a goal within a few seconds. and everyone should have seen the last goal. it was amazing. can't manage to describe it in words :)
no one.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
12:17 AM;
i'm feeling moody/down/irritated/frustrated/lonely all at the same time.
i guess, just going back to the old days.
again.
no one.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
11:15 PM;
today, could have been any normal tuesday. but no. that wasn't the way it turned out. i woke up on time today. in fact, way before my alarm (which is my mum) rang. slowly got up, pick some clothes to wear, went to bathe, pack my bag, ate my breakfast and slack in front of the computer. again. i'm getting sick of computer. i wonder how people live their everyday life with it.
as per normal, slacking in front of the computer, accompanied by chocolates, made me rushed out of the house then. i'm always rushing due to this. once you slack, you don't feel like doing anything else. lucky for me, i wasn't wearing heels. it made walking -and running- much easier. however, i reached 5 minutes before i should. slack throughout the whole morning, till the boss found out that we got nothing to do. being nice, he told us, after lunch, he would be giving work.
went for early lunch at 1130. i ate quite a huge meal, that i'm not hungry till now. then, when i'm almost done, clarence, martina and the boss joined us for lunch. and there, we talked just like normal friends, joke, opinions, views and thoughts were shared. and for once, i used a total of one hour for lunch break :). actually, they are quite funny and friendly people. i should be enjoying my attachment in such environment. but somehow, i missed school that i went to MEL knowing there would be nothing for me there.
work was given to me. totally different from my partner's. so, i'm on my own for this task. was quite lost from the start. then, i somehow figure out how to do and get some guidance from my senior. i finished it before six. i hope i'm on the right track.
arh, it's been a week since i start my attachment. and a week more to game. a week more to the ending of everything :) i'm glad. more than just happy. ecstatic.
after work, met him a little while. i celebrated my birthday with his family, with two cakes ad nineteen candles. yes, all nineteen of them. and it made me realise, i've blew more than nineteen candles today, had more than one cake (six cakes altogether). but thanks for all of the cakes.
i don't know what to feel. for now.
no one.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
9:18 PM;
today, i'm 19 years old. yes, 19 years old. damn it. i must stop going around saying that i'm 18 plus. pffft. by 12 am today, messages start coming in. i'm glad i put my phone off to silent mode before i sleep (which i normally don't), or else, i can't sleep with all the messages coming in. the wishes were nice. thanks everyone :)
however, this year, birthday's different. normally, i meet my friends, on the day itself. but this year, i'm out with my family for hari raya visiting. my friends celebrated my birthday last thursday, and it felt weird when someone's not around. missing her. somehow counting down to the day she's back here :). and she sent me an e-card :D. i miss her even more now.
this year, has been different. very different. but, i'm contented with what i have, and what i am now. thanks everyone, for all the wishes :) i'm 19. PFFFT!
next week's schedule is super duper duper tight. can't wait to get over it. pffft.
no one.
Saturday, October 13, 2007
7:48 PM;
arh. camera got screwed.
spoil my day, dying to snap tons of pictures. i even carry extra battery in case. argh. however, managed to snap a few. don't worry, nothing about the camera functions or something.
it dropped.
heartpain ): did something out of boredom.
supposed to be something plain and simple.
but cause of me and my itchy hand, it turns out like this.
our first movie. our song :)
exactly seven months ago.
130307 :)
no one.
Friday, October 12, 2007
10:55 PM;
today marks the last day of fasting month. today's also freddy's and ravi's birthday :) happy birthday guys.
let's start with yesterday. after work, went to meet the gang to celebrate ravi's and fred's birthday (unknowingly, they celebrated mine too). it was nice to meet after such a long time. went bowling for 2 games. and i played crap as usual, but, i score one strike. and i was damn happy with just one strike. naturally lousy at bowling. so, a strike is more than enough to make me smile through the night. so, the laughter, the cake and the present made me really happy. and i won't forget the "nizam's girl" nick they gave me. that was funny too.
today was a long day. and there's ups and downs all in one day. what a way to end a fasting month. work finish damn early today. i think i only worked for 2 hours. during lunch period, they went to kbox, had a farewell time for one of them, at same time celebrated birthdays. yes they celebrated mine too. i was touched. i just joined them few days back, and they wer celebrating my birthday. sweet.
met sin ee for slippers exchange. managed to do so. got myself some new jeans :) i love. can't wait to wear them. then, we headed to training. and after training, no one should know, cause, it's just nothing good to know. nothing. and my day had to end like that. how wonderful.
i'm sorry if i'm a little too obsess, but all i wanted was just to commit.
and if you don't bother, than don't care. you didn't ask if i need to eat. you didn't care that i just got home, have yet to unpack. you just know that work's done fast and quick. whatever makes you happy.
no one.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
10:28 PM;
like what i hope, everyone in the company is friendly. it's just a small company, so i guess, that's why everyone is so friendly towards each other. felt quite comfortable with the surroundings after quite some time. and i'm allowed to bring my own cup for coffee and stuffs. and we're allowed to wear jeans to work. how wonderful. dress smart casual, or something. never really see the difference.
today, we weren't filled with projects straightaway. we had small trainings to learn how to use new softwares, and the softwares used are really interesting!
met him after work. had dinner over at his place. and a ride home. what's better than today?
i think it's pms again. i just don't feel like talking for now. ):
no one.
12:00 AM;
yes today, like a few more hours, and i'll be on attachment. argh. i just wish to have another week of holidays just like all my other schoolmates. but still, i'mlooking forward. met my internship partner just now. no idea who he was. but now i do. friendly. that's very comforting. i mean, it's always best to work with someone you feel comfortable with rather than someone you don't. i just hope the supervisor is as friendly :)
went shopping for my office wear. almost went nuts. when you need something, it just isn't there. how frustrating. however, managed to get some. and he was being very patient (thank god).
okay, i just hope, today, won't be crazy :)
sunday's game was good. so proud of everyone. they played well. even coach said so. i love the girls :D
no one.
Thursday, October 04, 2007
11:42 AM;
There are moments when I don't know if it's real Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation
i miss all of these today :(
no one.
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
10:33 PM;
If it's meant to be,
It can only be good.
i love this phrase, which (in certain cases) is true. like how we believe there's blessing in disguise.
anyway, had my last lesson today. no more lesson. left evaluation and test, then i'll be on my way to pratical - provided, i pass the test. felt quite relieve that i've cleared the lessons. cause, they're time wasting, time consuming, and incomprehensible. especially about the clutch. so confusing, and the worst part, when they try to explain it verbally, when it's better shown. very confusing.
however, i was looking forward to what's happening after lesson. yes, shopping :D. suppose to just get one bag, ended up buying more than just a bag. looks like, i've got to start saving.
i'm so tired. i'm just so tired of everything. i need a break.
no one.
she's someone in your life
she's someone you love <3
she'll go nasty if you make her cry.
libra